Secrets that should not be kept
by GoWaitInTheCar
Summary: One-shot. Gaara and Neji were not lovers, there was no relationship. It was just an agreement, an open invitation on both ends but could there ever be more to the sexual affair the two shared? GaaraxNeji.


Author's Note: I do not own Naruto. This is simply a fanfiction.

**Secrets that should not be kept**

The sunlight cracked through the wood blinds, imprinting its bright light on to the walls and directly onto Neji's slumbering face. Feeling the heat start to bother him, he rubbed his eyes open. The room was of warm décor. The sheets themselves were burgundy and ivory and incredibly soft. Sighing, he looked at the red head next to him; the sheets were tangled amongst the two. The red head's pale skin was a contrast to the entire room. Neji sat up, resting his arms on his knees. He knew the steady breathing from the pale body next to him was only pretending to sleep. The Kazekage of Sunagakure could never sleep despite the sand demon removed from his small petite body, no longer reining his nightmares. Many times he had told the insomniac he didn't have to pretend to be normal with him, his behavior did not weird him out or did he think less of the young Kazekage. Yet the Kazekage had a habit of pretending. They had fought together in the Great War and he trusted the red head with great conviction as a leader. At the time, they didn't become just comrades but a trust was built between the two. But what they did behind closed doors, no one knew. It was nearly five months the two had started sleeping together. They were not lovers, there was no relationship; It was merely a mutual agreement. No strings attached, an open invitation on both ends, and no one was to know. For fear Gaara's new found exploration of sex would diminish the loyalty of Suna's people and Neji's clan would disown their own pride and future. They were each other's secret. Neji slid out of the bed and made his way to the bathroom.

The hot shower water ran through his raven hair, the ends clinging to his toned back. The steam quickly filled the bathroom, fogging the large mirror. The swirl tattoo of the ANBU on his right arm. He was the first of the Hyuga to join the ANBU and that meant he was treated with even more respect from his clan. Even his Uncle prided Neji like he was his own flesh and blood. The Clan had started pressuring Neji to marry and start passing on the Hyuga bloodline but he simply was not ready to make a huge commitment. It did not help the fact that he simply wasn't interested in women. He couldn't see himself with a wife. Maybe when he was 30 he would settle down for the sake of his clan, but he was only 22. He was still young and making a great reputation amongst the ANBU. Neji walked a fine line each time he and the Kazekage touched. To think if anyone found out, he felt he would die. Thinking about this made his temples tense with a migraine starting to creep up. Exhaling, he tried clearing his mind until he felt the tension slip away.

Neji slid back into his Anbu uniform and put his hair into a high ponytail. His mask was on the holster on his hip. It's white face with black designs around the eyes. Revealing his face in his ANBU uniform was against the law but he trusted Gaara to know the mask belonged to his face. Besides, Gaara had already figured out which one he was simply by his body. No one had ever seen Neji's body in its whole, glorious and beautifully toned form the way Gaara had. No one had explored it with their hands and mouth, every inch etched into memory, every curve and every defined line. Gaara would recognize his toned body even fully clothed. Gaara was not Neji's first but Neji was Gaara's. Neji's first had been quick, unsatisfying and lacking any excitement. He couldn't remember the civilian's name or remember his face. Neji's Shinobi stamina was higher and before he knew it, it was over and the exhausted civilian lay over him, panting. For a long time, Neji thought he simply wasn't into sex due to the bad experience. His first had let him down in more ways than he imagined possible. Neji's byakugan eyes still wondered over other attractive males and he remembered them vividly while he was alone to relieve the sexual frustration.

Being gay was not against the law but it was greatly frowned upon amongst Shinobi villages since they did not have a normal life expectancy, most belonged to clans that their future depended on having children to pass on their clan's legacy. The Hyuga Clan in particularly disowned any homosexuals. He swore to himself he would never tell them, he would never reveal his need for another man's touch. He would have to sacrifice his own happiness for his duty to his clan. He would never tell a soul about his sexual affair with the Kazekage of Sunagakure. Even though his curse was lifted, he still felt like a caged bird at times. He felt alone.

The proposal for their agreement came to a shock for Neji. Gaara was in Konoha for the Chunin exams and it was no secret he was busy spending time with the gang after his meetings with the Hokage. Kazekage or not, he was still Gaara. He had certainly come a long way from the dangerous boy Neji once saw defeat his comrade Rock Lee so long ago. Gaara was absolutely crazy and emotionless then. Gaara was no doubt more powerful and a force to be feared but he wasn't the same as that boy. He was silent but approachable, cautious yet trusting and above all else, considerate. On the rare occasions at the bbq pit, seeing him smile was a big feat while everyone else laughed and reminisced about awkward incidents on their missions (Naruto having the most stories). After saying their goodbyes, the old gang went their separate ways. Ino held on to Shikamaru's arm as he waved. Naruto followed behind Kiba and Chouji. Sakura and Hinata bowed slightly to the young Kazekage before heading home. Shino, Tenten, and Rock headed straight home to get a good night's rest before their mission.

"_Are you coming Gaara?" asked Temari. Kankuro looked back at his younger brother, stopping from heading off without his siblings._

"_Go on without me. I'd like to catch up with Neji" Gaara nodded. His siblings simply shrugged and headed back to their hotel. Gaara stared after his siblings until they were out of sight. Neji was a bit taken back that Gaara wanted to talk to him._

"_Could we talk privately?" his teal eyes finally meeting the pale white ones that looked down to him._

_Neji nodded, leading the way to the Hyuga territory. He walked in front of the red head through the courtyards and through the halls of the large mansion that was the branch house and to a secluded wing that was his own. Gaara leaned against the support beam as he watched Neji sit on the floor, his knees under him._

_Ever so blunt and to the point, "Have you ever had sex with a man?"_

_Neji's eyes widened in surprise. 'How did he know?' His pale eyes never left the teal ones as they stared back._

"_Why would you ask me something like that?" Neji's voice was a bit defensive as he tried to keep his cool._

"_It's a question"_

"_I'm not gay-" quick to defend himself. His heart rate was picking up._

"_I did not ask if you were gay. I asked had you ever had sex with a man before"_

_Neji was at a lost. How did the red head know of his sexuality? His question was blunt and out right prying into Neji's privacy. When Neji looked down to the floor, unable to answer, Gaara folded his arms across his chest, "Would you have sex with me?"_

"_What?"_

_Gaara did not repeat himself. _

"_I-I told you. I'm not gay"_

_Gaara squatted down in front of Neji, their eyes leveled. Gaara studied the Hyuga's face which all the more made the Hyuga uncomfortable. He trusted Gaara and could honestly say he had never felt bothered being alone with him until now. Neji never thought of Gaara in that way before._

"_I am not asking for anything more than that. I'm curious what it would be like. I have these.. urges and I would like to play them out"_

"_Why me? There are plenty of gay men in civilian cities"_

"_Finding one wouldn't be hard, my identity would be safe and I would have nothing to lose. Only problem I see is a civilian wouldn't be able to keep up with a Shinobi sexually. I'm asking you because I trust even if you said no, you would keep it between us. I trust you and I.." his voice trailed a bit, "I think your attractive, Neji"_

_Neji still didn't lift his eyes. He was too lost in his own mind to notice Gaara's slight red cheeks quickly disappearing._

"_I only want to see what it'd be like. It can be as many times as you want if you agree."_

_Neji contemplated everything the Kazekage was saying. It was true that a civilian was no match sexually but aside from his own sexually frustrated body, would sleeping with Gaara be something he wouldn't regret later? Would Gaara use it against him later to betray Konoha? Neji mentally shook his head. 'No, Gaara would never do anything so beneath him'. _

_Looking up at the teal eyes in front of him, "Just sex? Nothing more?"_

_Gaara nodded._

_Silence._

'_Sex would change everything. This conversation alone will change how I look at him. Either keep my friend or start something we may regret. I can't risk my family finding out'_

"_Sorry to reject your offer but no"_

_Gaara stood, his expression the same as always. "I see. I hope our conversation stays between us"_

_Neji nodded and bowed slightly. _

_He had stayed up the entire night thinking about the younger man, what it'd be like to have sex with someone like Gaara. He found himself touching himself at the thought of Gaara's sexually aroused face, moaning, shivering underneath his touch. His heavy breathing quickening as his hand pumped. Soon his hand was sticky and he shamed himself for even thinking about Gaara like that. Gaara had definitely grown up but he was still a petite and lithe man. Neji couldn't deny that Gaara was beautiful. His eyes were one of a kind and were bright and electric. His skin had smooth complexion._

_Seeing the Kazekage around town for the Chunin exams was hard on Neji. His thoughts always trailing back to the offer. Neji stood behind Tsunade like the other kage's ANBU members did. It was a precaution set in place since the Third Hokage's death. His face was hidden behind the white mask with black marks around the eyes. He could feel a set of eyes on him, not an ANBU's but the teal eyes of someone important. It made his stomach turn at the fear that Gaara could read his mind, knowing he had masturbated to him, pinpointing his identity behind his mask as if saying 'I know what you did'. His body did not waiver throughout the final stages of the exam. Neji was anxious to be released for the day._

_Neji walked along the streets of Konoha in his street clothes. It was late and everyone was asleep. He had tossed and turned but he could not fall asleep. The night was cool and the sky was clear. With his hands in his pockets, he kicked at the rocks along the street. A small rock suddenly hit the side of his head and he looked up at the rooftops at the direction it came from. The Kazekage was leaning back against the tile, a small smile on his lips._

_Neji sat next to Gaara as they sat in silence. Being close the younger man, he wanted to reach out and touch him. It had been such a long time since he had sex. He tried pushing the thought of Gaara moaning out of his thoughts as he sat there. He couldn't help it but the offer was perhaps his only chance at being sexually pleased, his chance at a life that he wanted to be open about but couldn't. It was only sex and if it was only once, perhaps it would be worth it. He needed this more than he wanted to admit. _

"_Gaara, your offer from the other day. Is it still on the table?"_

_Gaara eyed the older man._

_Neji fidgeted his hands that were between his knees, "Can we go inside?"_

_Neji closed the door to Gaara's hotel room as they entered. Gaara watched with the same expression less demeanor as Neji removed his shirt slowly, revealing his toned torso. Gaara's eyes took in the older man for all it was worth, his expression suddenly softened. Gaara hesitantly reached out, not sure if he was allowed to touch Neji. Neji pulled his hand closer so that it made contact with his chest. _

_Gaara's eyes looked up at Neji's, "What?"_

_Neji was confused, "I didn't say anything?"_

_Gaara nodded, swallowing hard. His hand trailed down the define lines in Neji's abdomen. _

_Neji pulled the petite boy into his chest, his hungry lips meeting the Kazekage's. Without hesitation, Gaara opened his mouth, their tongues massaging into each other. Neji couldn't unbutton Gaara's jacket fast enough as they made their way to the bed._

When Neji finally came out of the bathroom, a wild haired Gaara was resting against the head board. Large teal eyes watched Neji move across the room as he gathered his things to leave. It was the routine and there was no need to say goodbye. What started out as a sexual affair was becoming more to him. There was no else in the world he that could make him feel vulnerable, excited, dependent and happy as he was when he was alone with Neji. If only Neji knew. As Neji put on his mask, heading for the door, Gaara called out to him. The Hyuga kneeled down by the bed, lifting the mask back up. His lips were met with the warm pink lips of the Kazekage.

I really like this pairing. Maybe I'll start another one after I finish my Kankuro fanfics ^_^

Review?

Shameless plugging:

Ino/Shika/Kankuro called If I had known then what I know now  
KakashixYamato called Nostalgia and Splinters  
KibaxKankuro called Struggle through the Sand and Leaves.  
SasukexOC called On our own


End file.
